Funnies
by sasori'sloverandwife
Summary: the title says it all


Funnies

School hurts my brain (Make it stop!!!)

Bravo. You really know how to make an ass out of yourself.

I'm not gonna waste the perfect comeback on you now. But don't think I don't have one. Oh, yes it's time will come.

When all else fails, Blow shit up.

Maturity....Sucks.

Smile....it makes people wonder what you're thinking....

You are the diet coke of Evil.

You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else.

RAWR! I will eat you!

Yea I'm a loser but the coolest loser you'll ever meet.

I like the insanity, but stop the stupidity.

Elicia says, make love not war.

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they are when you KILL them.

HARD WORK never killed anybody but why take chances?

Hey you know what? Screw you.

Your stupidity broke my brain.

AWAY!!! To the Pimp Mobile.

All STRESSED OUT and no one to CHOKE!

Connection to Brains....failed.

Fear my dorkness.

Your stupidity astound me.

You're all SICK SICK little MOO COWS!

Surrounded by idiots. Please send help. scotch. AMMO!

I'm on crack! AREN'T you?

Evil will always prevail because good is DUMB!

What the HELL do you mean all the cupcakes are GONE?!?!?!

The truth about penguins: one by one the penguins slowly steal our sanity.

WOW you really are stupid.

Ya know....people like you are the reason why people like me need medication....

I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

Determined to plot EVIL!

I'm not retarded....I just like licking windows!!!

How about a nice, tall glass of shut the fuck up?

Elmo knows where you live.

People are like SLINKIES! Basically useless and yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down stairs.

Inside me is a thin woman trying to get out. I usually shut the bitch up with chocolate.

Too often we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown. BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch slap that mother fucker upside the head. Pass it on...

See my cuteness and TREMBLE!!!!! TREMBLE!!!!!

He said...I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said...You wear pants don't you?

Jesus christ! I said move motherfucker! What the fuck do you need to be driving at 60 MPH in this god damned lane for when there is a perfectly free lane directly to your right assfuck! Oh you're gonna step on your god damned brakes, now, bitch? I bet you think that's funny? Lets see how funny you think it is when they're extracting my god damned car from your fucking tailpipe, you cunt!

Smile. It makes people run away.

Prep, goth, punk WHATEVER! Real people don't need labels.

Go straight to hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

Icons are for LOSERS. Oh wait....

Don't hit kids! No seriously they have guns now.

A good friend will come bail you out of jail....A true friend will be sitting next to you saying "Damn...we fucked up."

Girls dig guys with long hair and tails. The skirt doesn't hurt either. Girls like nice legs.

If you can't DAZZLE the world with your KNOWLEDGE then BAFFLE them with your BULLSHIT!

Domestic Violence Solves Everything.

I shall kill you with my uber BREAK DANCING!

I'm small, cute and I have really big eyes. Please don't hurt me.

¿Como Estas? Bitches!

Whoopdee flippin' DO!

Izumi will kick your ass with a *Spatula*

Sorry I'm allergic to Bullshit.

all I hear is: "blah blah blah I'm a loud motherfucker"

Thinking is hard.

Are you sure I can't kill him?

You did not just call me a Oompa Loompa!?!

Winter wonderland my ASS!

Can't sleep...CLOWNS will eat me.

God, I love waffles.

Watch yourself...I don't get mad, I get even.

You say "Tomato" I say "Fuck you"

Is it time for your medication or mine?

God sent me to piss the world off.

Do I look like a fucking people person?

Sorry I'm late. I got into a argument with my rice krispies. I distinctively heard "Snap, Krackle, Fuck that asshole."

I rule so KISS my chibi ASS!

Come on everybody! Say it with me! WHAT THE FUCK! Good! Now lets try that again!

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Stress: is when you wake up screaming, and realize you weren't sleeping.

Happy thoughts....Happy thoughts.....puppies....ice cream.....Fat People Falling Over.

You know what? Fuck your movie, Fuck the internet, and finally, above all other things to fuck, FUCK YOU!

If you don't get caught, everything is legal!

I see the CHAOS, I find my PEACE, I go back outside cause peace is OVERRATED!

Who drank my APPLE JUICE!??

Fuck you vegetarians! I did NOT climb to the top of the food chain to eat CARROTS!

America! Fuck Yeah!

This is you god damn fault because you god damn decided to pick a god damn fight with the god damn guy I'm looking for but can't god damn find because you god damn scared him off!! Damnit, I sounded like such a redneck right there!

I don't need this! Where's my coffee!?

You're trying to figure me out? I'm flattered.

You are the worst imaginary friend EVER!

I'm a one-man idiot.

Fact: clowns eat people.

Help!!! What's the number for 9-1-1?

OMG! I broke a nail!!

If somebody raped a prostitute, would they be charged with theft or rape?

Why are they always after me god damned lucky charms?

Who eats two cookies? I eat fig newtons by the sleeve!

How about you go play "Drink what's under the sink"?

Evil has never been so cute and fuzzy!

I smile because you've all finally driven me insane!

Leggo my Eggo or I will kill you.

Death is a way of telling Koenma "you can't fire me, I quit!"

What do you *mean* "We're out of poptarts"?!?

I AM NOT CRAZY!! SO STOP SAYIN' THAT! I'm just.....not normal....

But I NEED tacos!! I need them or I will explode. That happens to me sometimes.

They always say a murderer is a loner. Of course he's a loner! He's been killing people!!!

I will rule you!

You are so dead when I'm not NAKED!

So tell me, what's it's like living in a constant haze of stupidity?

Kurama: pink is a manly color....right? Hiei: women are the source of all evil. I need to pick up some chicks! Yusuke: i always thought I wore a shirt under this jacket.... Kuwabara: the more serious I look, the less stupid people will think I am. Aw yeah...

Tell me: this is all a nightmare.

Your IQ test came back negative...not surprised.

Ah, did I step on your poor little feelings.

Excuse me while I find a container for my JOY!

Strangers are just friends rape in a dark alley waiting to happen.

Because, shut up, that's why!

Never trust a smiling Fire Demon!!

Nah, nah, nah. I'm not listening. Nope not gonna listen. Not gonna listen.

I'm not anti-social, you dumb piece of crap.

What part of KISS MY ASS don't you LOSERS understand?

I swear to drunk, I'm not GOD!

You, yeah, you. Go fuck yourself.

Two words: Couples counseling.

NYPD means I will KNOCK YO' PUNK ASS DOWN!!

Don't make me bite you!

Here's a better question: why don't you go fuck yourself?

The problem with America is that they haven't killed enough people yet.

I REALLY don't think a killing spree is going to make things better for us.

Go ahead piss me off. I've got tons of closet space.

If you can not laugh at yourself...at least allow me the pleasure.

I do SO have a penis! It's HOT, too!!! and THIS big!!!!

Don't think of it as DEATH; Think of it as a really long and deep sleep. WITH BLOOD!

Raise the roof!!! No seriously, RAISE THE ROOF!! IT'S HEAVY!!!

He's naked and wet. What more can we ask for?

no santa?

Watch as I shake my HOTNESS at YOU!

Smile....it confuses people....

How dare you say bunnies are stupid!

Meet Colonel Roy Mustang: High ranking military official...Smooth talking ladies man...Lazy bastard.

Wheeee!

Ed is proof that all Blondes aren't stupid.

Being mature is overrated.

WTF...everything's....HAPPY!

Greed is unimpressed with your stupid SHIT.

What is this 'happy place' you speak of?

What the HELL is wrong with you?

Nice to meet you...now DIE!

yes I know I'm awesome. *sparkle* *sparkle*

Just a little bit insane....

We're all MAD here.

I'm a GOPFY goober Yeah!

Ed hates you...and no...there's nothing you can do about it.

I'm a NINJA!

My expression says it ALL.

Being evil is FUN.

Hughes has spotted you. He is armed with photos of his family. Obvious exits: none.

For the last time I am not a god damned HOBBIT!

Of course I'm mature.

They think I'm crazy.

I see TALL PEOPLE.

You killed my brains.

[insert evil laugh]

Rule #1 for Animes: Women Hit Harder Than Villains.

Six in the freaking MORNING!

GOT FLUFF? you know, being a full-blooded demon and lookin' this good is hard work. so when I get a little run down I reach for some nice, refreshing fluff. it keeps me warm and looks hella tight too! studies show that 9 out of 13 demons don't get enough fluff, so the next time you're heading out...grab some fluff.

My reasons why I HATE Kikyo: 1)she is a walking zombie! Hello! 2)Inuyasha won't tell Kagome his feelings because of Kikyo and Kagome won't tell Inuyasha her feelings for him because of Kikyo...in my opinion, she is in the way of a relationship between them and should just DIE....again. 3)She's alive...that's a reason for me :P 4)she lives off the souls of innocent dead women! Their poor souls are being used to give her clay body the energy and life that she needs... 5)she's a soul-sucking evil zombie for crying out loud! 6)it's because of Kikyo that Inuyasha and Kagome aren't 'together' and I hate her with a passion for that! 7)she sucks plain and simple.

BEWARE the floating Sango-head!

Vote 4 Fluffy! I'm adorable!

Bow down....to the great Inuyasha chibi lord! Ruler of all chibis! Fear the cuteness!

I like to laugh at the pain of others.

even demons need their pocky!

Please note: We are not responsible for any injuries, accidents, and or death. WARNING: when grouchy, dog demon tends to bite. TO avoid injury, keep your hands away at all times. Do not feed wild demon, he is currently on a well looked at diet. Follow these rules, and be sure not to say 'SIT'.

I'm about to get punched AREN'T I?

Real men don't NEED no frikken instructions!!!

That's right. He's looking at YOU!

OMG....WTF?

Inuyasha the desperate housewife.

Oh the flavor that you savor.

Over the years I have found that our friendship stretches....farther than Shippo's face that is! We'll always be best buds!

I dig DUDES with DOG EARS!

Inuyasha: everybody loves the bastard.

I called Sasuke gay and he hit me with his man purse.

Jaken is a yoda wanna-be. See? This is him trying to use the force. Total wanna-be-ness.

Oh you've got to be SHITTING ME!

Really, whatever makes you think I'm gay?

OMGWTF!!

Get ready to face the power of the EMO!

Get ready to RUMBLE!

Who said GIRLS can't fight?

let the CUTENESS commence.

.....holy shit.

my anime boyfriend CAN BEAT UP you anime boyfriend.

Sorry girls, I'm gay.

i'm just using this icon because it says 'Hiei' on it.

No! Hiei is MY bitch!

I'm just using this icon because it says 'Kurama' on it.

Eh?

Let the fangirls drool.

We all need a big strong man.....

BEWARE the lightning glare.

"I love you!!" 'Where the hell did this come from!' Isn't love a funny thing!

*Technical Difficulties* *Please Stand By*

If I stay like this for 5 mins. Can I have a cookie?

sharing is caring....and Koga doesn't care.

Who needs a bed when you have a FLUFFY!

FEAR the FLUFF!!

ADOPT-A-PET name: Inuyasha breed: um... housebroken: yes eats: ramen noodles, potato chips, etc. vaccinations: no one's brave enough to give him one neutered: his brother says he is good with children: not really...not good with adults either.

ADOPT-A-PET name: Sesshomaru a.k.a. "Fluffy" breed: thoroughbred dog demon housebroken: yes eats: um...food? vaccinations: YOU try sticking him with a needle, OK? neutered: we asked him...then he made that face in the photo above good with children: sort of....


End file.
